Friday, October 12, 2018

UPDATE! I KNOW, RIGHT?!?

Hey, all! I know the writing has been sparse here, lately, as we focus on the Podcast, but I do, at least, want to start using this page as updates for that piece (and maybe still throw in a review from time to time).

That said, I just want to announce that there will be no episode next week because we're podcasting FROM NIGHTMARES FILM FESTIVAL starting on Thursday, 10/18/2018!

We'll have mini recap episodes posted every day, live Facebook feeds throughout the weekend with, hopefully, interviews with some of the directors, writers, and stars of these awesome films, a WHOLE lot of flirting with Jason Tostevin, the devilishly handsome maniac behind the festival, swag updates (because who doesn't like movie stuff?), and a big wrap-up on Sunday. (Which might, possibly, not go out until Monday, but this is our first time. Be gentle.)

 LET'S GET SCREAMING!

Thursday, May 10, 2018

Importance...

Hey, kids!

I'm still with you and I hope you're enjoying the podcast! Sorry I haven't written a lot lately. Tons of irons in the fire, as it were. I just had a moment with someone on Facebook and I thought I'd share.

A person wrote in a horror forum I belong to that "everything is misogynistic these days" in response to the original post about someone's lesbian co-worker saying that he shouldn't enjoy horror movies because they're all misogynistic.

 Now, first off, people have been saying this since the Women's Rights movement began (and, really, way before then, because it's true that horror movies tend toward the sexist due to their primary demographic being young men) but things are changing, particularly since the advent of the Final Girl trope, but when I pointed this out to him, his response was "Makes my point no less valid."

 My response at that point went as follows:

 "I mean, saying that something is misogynistic isn't automatically false, either. There's a LOT of anti-feminist material in horror movies even to this day and we do have to recognize that women, even though they make up the larger half of the population, are still mistreated.

Is EVERYTHING about horror misogynistic? Absolutely not. Should we recognize and call out misogynistic cinema and work to change it? 100% yes. If we can call out homophobic, transphobic, or racist material, we should be doing the same for women.

For example, the gay-themed slasher Hellbent. Hellbent contains a scene in which a character is beheaded ON A CROWDED DANCE FLOOR AND NO ONE REACTS TO IT, which displays gay people as shallow, narcissistic, puppets that don't pay attention to the world around them. I don't want that kind of representation, do you?

 I'm not saying "Write me Mary Sue Horror" at all, just make things believable. Write in misogynistic characters but write women strong enough to see those characters either quake in their boots or learn how NOT to be misogynistic. Write in misogynistic situations but then let women side-step or confront those situations in a positive way. Write LGBTQIA characters as actual people and not caricatures of themselves and, for fuck's sake, stop giving me AIDS-era tragedy porn.

We can make better and more positive cinema happen. We just have to make sure that problematic subject matter is written well and handled appropriately."

ANYWAY, kids! Reach out to us! Let us know what you like and what you don't like about the podcast and continue to like, subscribe, rate and review the podcast so that we can TAKE OVER THE WORLD AND INSTITUTE CTHULHU-CULT-LIKE MADNESS!

Friday, September 29, 2017

Expansion

WHEW!

Having multiple irons in the fire is ROUGH!

I'll get back to writing reviews, I swear.  I'm just trying to get into a groove with the Podcast.

I have not forsaken you!

In the meantime, though, please feel free to like, subscribe, rate, review and all of that other stuff that makes a podcast happy!

Thanks! 

Monday, September 18, 2017

An Apology.

It's come to my attention that the "Transgender nun" comment made during the trailer portion of the It podcast was offensive.

The villain of Insidious 2 was not transgender.  He was an abuse victim, forced to live as a female, and could not break the cycle of abuse which is why he was the villain of the piece.  This is akin to Dorian Gray and Buffalo Bill and we no longer wish to portray members of the LGBTQIA community as abused, unstable, or deranged as we feel that this can and does lead to violence against us.  While we recognize the "Depraved Homosexual/Murderous Transsexual" trope exists, we do not wish to further it.  James Wan should have known better than to use the trope.

The comment (while, at the time, we felt it was an accurate descriptor, it wasn't) was not intended to harm and we now know that it is inappropriate as it is misrepresentative of our trans brothers and sisters.

Please forgive us. We can do better.

Thursday, September 7, 2017

But, What if I Don't WANT To Float?



You thought I was gonna write a review, didn't you?

*NELSON MUNTZ LAUGH*

No.  You're not getting a review right yet.  Next Wednesday, though, the podcast is gonna be FUN! 

At least, that's the plan.

See ya then.

Sunday, September 3, 2017

What Did I Fucking Tell You About Children?

"Oh, hey!  How ya doin'?  Podcasting is going well.  Work is fine.  How's the wife and kids?

Oh, your stepson is the Antichrist.  That's fun to know.  I'll, aaaahhhh... I'll be over here.  Not pointedly laughing at the horrible birthday clown who IS NOW ON FIRE, WHAT THE SHIT, MAN?!?"

And THAT'S the conversation I would be having with Adam Scott in the new Netflix piece, Little Evil, which wins absolutely no awards for having such a douchey name but it's still kinda fun, should I have gone into acting like I always wanted but my lack of any drive whatsoever kept me from pursuing, except I'm ALL ABOUT the casting couch because I am a sex-positive person and if a blowjob is gonna get me some choice parts, I swallow, thanks.



So, Adam Scott is playing Gary.  New stepdad to Lucas, the titular Little Evil, and new husband to Samantha (Evangeline Lilly) who is adorable and lonely and clueless.  She's really not a helicopter mom but she watches out for her boy.  Her boy who was conceived during a cult ritual and she fucking knew it, so her son being the actual Antichrist really shouldn't have come as such a shock to her but, y'know... here we are.

Awww, lookaher... All smiles and adorableness... and stupidity...
Gary, of course, being the stepdad, just wants to be a good guy.  Soapbox derby cars, ice cream, the works.  The kid, on the other hand, has some fuckin' issues.  The most pressing, of course, being that he is literally the spawn of Satan, begat via creepy reverend (Clancy Brown) who moves into town to harvest the goddamn crop.  Gary, meanwhile, is showing this dude property, none the wiser.  He's ALSO getting calls from the wedding videographer who, while taping the ACTUAL FUCKING TORNADO THAT DESTROYED THE WEDDING GROUNDS, noticed that Lucas was untouched by winds that have been known to pick up and toss around cows and trains.

Yo, Damien.  It's past your bedtime, buddy.
So, what does Lucas do to Gary the first day he drives him to school?  Manages to get himself detention and get Gary blamed for it.  Gary, who has to attend mandatory therapy and now has a Child Protective Services agent visiting (played delightfully by Sally Field).  His co-worker, a male-identifying individual by the name of Al (Bridget Everett), is also part of the the group, and they form a bro-bond over the whole thing.  A bond that is as tight as Octomom's pelvic floor.  At least at first.

She has a fantastic eye for sweater-vests.

Suffice it to say that Lucas is so upset at having a new daddy that he buries him alive.  Literally.  Called Samantha from a box under the swingset.  She DUG HIM OUT.  Which upsets Gary which upsets Samantha who puts Lucas in a time-out (seriously?) and proceeds to not believe Gary which almost gets divorce papers signed but flowers and a trip to the water park for Gary and Lucas are all it takes for happy families, I guess.

If this SOUNDS like a set-up, that's because it is.  What do we do with the Antichrist when we find him, kids?  That's RIGHT!  We try to kill him.  And that's when the fun REALLY starts.

No, for real, kids, other than that whitewashed sack of weeaboo fangasm, Death Note (which I'm currently in the middle of and thoroughly hating), Netflix is putting out some good material and, while this is not really Oscar-worthy (and come on, how much do I watch that is), it's actually pretty good.  It funny, it makes good use of its people, it's heartwarming in that "You can be whatever you want to be and I don't want to kill you, anymore" kinda way.  It's actually a decent "family" horror-comedy. 

Give it a shot.  It's cute. 

Monday, August 28, 2017

CCRB: The Podcast!

IT'S HERE!!!

CCRB:The Podcast is finally here!

We're hoping to have episodes up weekly and we're just waiting on iTunes to approve the feed so we can get it out that way.

In the meantime, enjoy our delightful conversation about Kong Cock.

Nobody ever said we were classy.