Because, seriously? SERIOUSLY? What the fuck were you thinking?
I was looking forward to Fright Night 2 because I really like Jaime Murray. This'll teach me to look forward to stuff. I can never have nice things.
We all know how the original Fright Night went and we all know how the first Fright Night 2 went. Because I told you. Because I'm awesome and I look out for you. I'm your bestest friend. Just like Evil Ed. Evil Ed loves you. Or at least he did in the original. And then he died. A lot. I'm not going to die. Not right now, anyway.
And, we all know how the remake of Fright Night went. Because any good horror movie fan would have seen it. It was OK.
And now, here we are with a remake of Fright Night 2.
|Oh, fuck me.|
This is EXACTLY like Fright Night except it takes place during a school trip to Romania (thus explaining the budget) and the vampire is a woman. A very famous woman.
|You know who I'm talking about.|
|That is a big-ass tub of blood.|
But, anyway, let's talk about sequels for a minute.
Aren't sequels supposed to at least acknowledge the events of the first movie and not retell the story of the first movie with the only changes being a gender-swap here and there? Isn't Evil Ed supposed to be a nerd, not a bro? Seriously, Evil Ed should be a BRONIE before being anything resembling "cool". Evil Ed is not all leather jackets and swagger. Evil Ed is cosplay and comic books. This ALONE makes me hate this movie. Didn't Amy have more sass even when she was played by a perky lesbian? Didn't Jerry Dandridge (not GERRI Dandridge, as she's named in this one) ooze more sex?
|Yeah. Not scary at all.|
Steer clear, kids. Even the boobs in this one are sad.
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